How would I go about writing for a character that doesn’t speak very much? In some testing writing I was doing the Main just seemed overpowered by the supporting characters. I was thinking of maybe making them think more so the reader is kind of viewing things from within their head more but I can’t seem to make it work because it all seems to become drowned in physical and emotional descriptions. Thanks, I love this blog so much!

fuckyeahcharacterdevelopment:

This is a tricky one. I’m assuming by ‘very much’, you mean they do speak sometimes just not all of the time.

Have a think about the following questions:

• Why does this character not speak very much? What is the cause behind that?

You need to know this because that way, you can incorporate some of the character’s own thoughts and feelings about their lack of desire/ability to speak, which will help the reader understand the character better. That way, when there are dialogue scenes in which the character does not participate, they will know that they are reporting on the speech of somebody else and are, for whatever reason you’ve chosen, not going to join in, at least not verbally.

• How do you format their inner thoughts alongside the dialogue of other characters?

It is recommended that you come up with a format for how this character reports on speech and how their thoughts are interjected as a conversation unfolds. Even without a non-speaking character, your main should always be at the forefront of any development, reporting in on their feelings and thoughts, or having them narrated on in the event of third-person.

It’s really all about balance, so although you’re worried that their thoughts are ‘drowned in physical and emotional descriptions’, you can fix that in the editing stage later by considering how to balance your paragraphs better.

As for format, you could do something like this:

‘Well, what are we going to do about it?’ she asked.

‘Dunno, not my problem,’ came the reply.

Typical; I knew he would be that type of guy.

‘You think it’s that easy? That you can just walk away?’

‘Look, it’s not my business what you get up to. Not my fault you’ve invested yourself into somebody else’s life like this.’

‘Invested? I’m just doing what’s right’.

Yeah, exactly, I nod.

We were all stood here when it happened. It just wouldn’t feel right to walk away from it. As I’m considering this, I notice, just by Jeff’s feet, something unusual.

‘Take your morality complex,’ I hear him say, ‘and leave me alone. I’m not getting involved in this.’

That’s what you think.

He looks at me as I approach, kneel down by his feet, and tug from under his shoe a bloodied cloth. Come to think of it, he’s not the only one incriminated. Sal, following my line of sight, looks at her own hands in shock. I try to wipe away the marks on mine, only it smears, like warm paint. She locks eyes on Jeff’s clenched fists, on the crowbar he picked up in an attempt to prevent what happened, from happening.

‘Looks like you’ve got two choices,’ she says, smug. ‘Come with us, or walk yourself into a whole storm of trouble back home. Won’t be long before someone notices he’s missing, and they’ll all be asking where you were tonight.’

For third person, it’s going to be similar only there’ll be no ‘I’. It’ll be like,

‘Well, what are we going to do about it?’

‘Dunno, not my problem,’ said Jeff.

Typical, Tam thought, I knew he would be that type of guy.

‘You think it’s that easy?’ Sal pressed, ‘That you can just walk away?’

‘Look, it’s not my business what you get up to. Not my fault you’ve invested yourself into somebody else’s life like this.’

‘Invested?’ said Sal, exasperated. ‘I’m just doing what’s right.’

Tam nodded fervently from the sidelines, the reasoning behind the agreement being that they had all been there as witnesses. What right did they have to walk away from it, pretending it had never happened? It was whilst Tam considered this to herself that she noticed, under Jeff’s foot, something ominous…

• What prompts/cues provoke the character into speaking, if any?

If your character does speak at certain times/moments, what is it that prompts them to talk? An overwhelming amount of emotion? The sound of someone saying their name, or directing a question/request right at them?

In that case, you can welcome your character into the discussion if necessary by getting another character to perform that ‘command’.

• What does the character do as an alternative to speaking?

Say there’s a huge dialogue piece going on, and you find the character is just standing there, reporting what he, she and they say, without any active role in it. Although what I wrote up there isn’t exactly award-winning, I tried to put the ‘quieter’ character in the scene by allowing them to guide the story along. They found the bloodied cloth, because whilst the other two characters were arguing, they weren’t doing anything else.

Instead of other members of your cast jumping onto the next plot point, try to give more of the action to the main character. Reveal what needs to be revealed in the dialogue between the others, but ultimately, you need to give the power of movement and action to the main, so that the reader can ‘see’ how they are participating in a scene whilst still ‘hearing’ talk between the others.

Additionally, if this character uses some form of sign language or other motions to participate in speech, you can still bring them into a dialogue segment without having them say anything. Just make sure your other characters acknowledge your quieter character and ‘listen’/’watch’ them in some way, so their attention is as much on the main as your reader’s should be.

That’s about all I can think of right now. Assuming your character isn’t mute (or even better in terms of the following if they are), you might find some of the resources below useful:

• Mute & Non-Speaking Characters
• How to Write a Mute Character
• FYCD: ‘Mutism’ tag
• Tips on Writing Mute Characters
• Writing Mute Characters (article)
• Writing Mute Characters (forum post)
• Formatting for Non-Speaking/Mute Characters (forum post)

I hope all of this helps… Best of luck…!

– enlee